Americas Love Affair With Smut

I'm getting ready to leave for class this morning, to take my first exam (which I just aced thank you very much) and I turn on the TV to get the headlines. Instead I'm greeted with the Jerry Springer show. I know every single one of you have watched this at one point in time... probably religiously... but to my surprise I hear the announcer's voice exclaiming "Just voted the worst television show in the history of television and into its 12th season...". Now, isn't that interesting.


The King of Smut

I'm pondering how a show that is acclaimed to be the worst show in television history actually makes it to the 12th season. Even more boggling is how they've managed to accumulate enough white (and other various colors) trash to provide entertainment (if you want to call it that) every weekday for 12 years. I guess if you go on the theology that every house on wheels (aka. trailer) houses some sort of sick situation, then just Louisiana alone could provide enough material for that long. But then we throw in the factor of... what kind of brainless individual would proudly display their obvious low standards of living? How many people out there are willing to show that they are the products of inbreeding and ignorance?


The classic: Whatever! *hand in face* stance

Apparently, more than one would wish. These are probably the same people, who fail to obey the standard traffic law of "Do not pull out onto the road unless you have time to match the speed of the traffic in which you are entering." You know the kind, they apparently think their '75 multi-colored Pinto is capable of doing such. GOD THAT IS SO FREAKING AGGRAVATING!!! (that and people who don't use their turn signals and I'm gonna include the moron that started backing up on me in the parking lot this morning with his big ole truck... USE YOUR FREAKING REARVIEW MIRROR AND SEE THE RED CAR BEHIND YOU!)

Anyways, back to my point. America's love affair with smut goes as far back as the "romance" novels you still see while waiting to pay for your gas and that impulse purchase of Resees Peanut Buttercups. Who wouldn't look at a picture of some young hot hunk with a rather... *ahem* endowed lower region... and want to read what he did with it? Well besides all non-gay men, likewise I don't include myself in that group when I can easily get the real thing if I wanted to. Moving on, America continues to be fascinated by the most minute details of our favorite stars lives... (OMG -->insert latest teen idol here<-- just sneezed... I wish I could sneeze like that!!! Maybe if I get the pillowcases with pictures of -->insert latest teen idol<-- and the bedspread and the watch and the... oh shut up and get a life).


Am I the only one that notices that there's always a white horse
involved in these senarios? I find that disturbing.

Similarly, as long as there are people that willing to tell the nation that they slept with their wife's sister, mother, and daughter... all of which resulted in the births of three-eyed children... America is willing to watch. I know that's because it somehow enriches our lives on a daily basis... or just makes us feel better about our own lives... or simply makes you appreciate the fact that you have all your teeth intact. I'm sure some are simply captivated by the fact that there are people out there that think there's nothing wrong with having over 60 sexual partners (some of which, I highly doubt they could find 60 horny dogs that would do them, muchless... other people)... but whatever your reason is... it better be a good one. Not one of those, "well I couldn't find the remote" excuses either... TV's still come with buttons attached to the front.


"Back off hoe, that's MY cousin... ummm man... I had his three-eyed baby!"
You lucky girl you... ya picked a real winner... and staying in the family at the same time.

Just remember, everytime you hear the audience chant "Jerry, Jerry, Jerry!" you loose on average 45 billion brain cells.