Weird News

Man Reclaims Testicle
In February, Amanda Monti, 24, of Birkenhead, England, was sentenced to 30 months in jail for ripping off one of her ex-boyfriend's testicles with her bare hands in a rage over his refusal to have sex. (According to witnesses, Monti briefly hid the testicle in her mouth, but a friend retrieved it and handed it back to the man, saying, "That's yours.")

Wow... I'm actually speechless on this one folks.

Flying Squirrel Wins Reprieve in Canada
TORONTO - Sabrina the flying squirrel has been allowed permanent residency in Canada after a government order to deport her was reversed this week. Amist all the legal battle, how does Sabrina feel about this... her owner says that she's “Oblivious to the whole thing, poor little innocent squirrel.”

Innocent... whoever thinks that squirrels are innocent has another thing coming... they are just spies for the penguins."

Ms. Wheelchair Stands Up, Loses Crown
APPLETON, Wis. - Ms. Wheelchair Wisconsin has been stripped of her title because pageant officials say she can stand — and point to a newspaper picture as proof. Janeal Lee, 30, who has muscular dystrophy, was snapped by The Post-Crescent newspaper standing. Candidates for the crown have to “mostly be seen in the public using their wheelchairs or scooters, otherwise you’ve got women who are in their wheelchairs all the time and they get offended if they see someone standing up. We can’t have title holders out there walking when they’re seen in the public.”

Well... that'll teach her to... be all miraculously healed and stuff

Woman Walking Dog has Poop Bag Snatched
SAN DIEGO - The hunt is on for a different kind of burglar. Police in San Diego are searching for a gunman who swiped a bag of poop from a woman out walking her dog, Misty. The woman told police that she was out walking her dog, Misty, on Monday night when a man in his 20s ran up behind her and grabbed the bag she was holding. When the gunman discovered what was in it, he threw it down in disgust, pointed his gun at the 32-year-old woman and demanded money. He then aimed his .22-caliber semiautomatic at Mist, who was later found guilty of pooping, and pulled the trigger twice but the gun didn't fire, so he fled the scene.

Overwhelming evidence was found in the bag and Misty was later found guilty of Public Pooping and sentenced to 30 dog years in the state pound.