Last night, my best friend, actor Paul Rudd, was abducted and was going to be sacrificed at some crazy Manson Family/KKK/Burning Man rally. They had him and several others tied to lawn chairs. I sneaked in to untie him (which was surprisingly difficult considering the facts... I didn't know the secret hand motions and dance moves) and next thing I hear, comedian Lamorne Morris (Winston from New Girl) being introduced onstage. Those psychotic racists were laughing their butts off... You understand how any of this is entirely impossible. Anywho, they busted me, not before I got Paul loose, so the chase was on. It wasn't much of a chase... turns out, they can't run...
they can only march!
*sigh* even my dreams tell me stupid jokes
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